More Importantly: How Will Rejection Affect You?
I shared deeply and openly in my videos about how a high school crush, CRUSHED my resolve and rendered me nearly useless in terms of connecting with people, especially when it comes to the opposite sex. I would always hesitate and have a fear of approaching women, well after my adolescent years.
You may or may not be consciously aware of this; at the time you take a risk to open you heart to connect with a woman you desire, got rejected, your unconscious mind creates a meaning around that event and your thought-filters will affect your future decision making and behavioural patterns.
It’s All in the Meaning
Human being a meaning creating machine. Everything we see, hear, smell, taste and feel has meaning attached to it. Some meanings to certain events can be pleasant while others are best forgotten. The person you become and the person whom you attract and be with are determined by how resourceful you (the unconscious part of you) are with the meaning you created within relevant events; in this case, around relationships and how well you approach courtship.
Resourceful Meaning
Being “resourceful” in this context is your ability to attain strategies, tools, human sensory inputs and other resources AND being able to maintain it. That’s attain and maintain. For example, being a nice, caring and loving person is resourceful because you can attain those qualities and you can maintain it. Maintain it indefinitely because it cost nothing to be nice and loving, right?
Unresourceful Meaning
As you might have guessed, unresourceful meaning in this context is your ability to attain strategies, tools, human sensory input and other resources and in this case, you’re UNABLE to maintain it. In other words, there is a limit by how much you can attain. For example, if you’re being a ‘scrooge’ or a consistently angry person there is a certain point where you can maintain that personality or behavioural because it is unpleasant and people are more likely to stay away from you. You cannot maintain this strategy if you’re objective is to make friends or go out on dates.
Note: if your objective is to be, metaphorically speaking, a Cast Away (you know, like the Tom Hanks movie) then being a consistently grumpy, angry, short-fuse person can be resourceful – only if you want to be a lonely sad person. You can attain your objective and maintain it.
The Problem
When a girl said something unpleasant about me, I unconsciously made an unresourceful meaning about how others (women) view me and how I look and feel about myself. This resulted in a decade of loneliness. Valentine’s Day is the least popular day for me. Romance and intimacy only took place in the movies. I thought for a looooooong time that only certain deserve love and happiness. Not me.
I would be afraid to ask girl’s out, let alone approach them in the first place. If ever I do engage girls in conversation, I’d feel nervous and inapt. If I was not a nerd before, I would now be a nerd as well as a geek in the presence of a pretty woman.
Simple Solution for Geeks Want Love
The solution is simple and quite logical, really! If you think about it, if unresourceful meaning leads to a particular result which is unfavourable then you must create resourceful meanings that will lead to your desire result.
How Can You Create Resourcefulness from an Unresourceful Meaning?
I said the solution simple. I didn’t say it is easy.
The strategy is to convert the original meaning to mean something else. Something different. Resourceful. Outcome driven. You can ‘reframe’ the meaning so that your decisions and behavioural filters can work for you instead of against you.
Imagine no longer being captive by old resourceful meaning. What can you be, do and have if you were FREE from past hurts? What if you were no longer afraid? What could you feel if you are successful? What would your life look like?
When I changed the meaning of an event, I became free from the emotional anchor that prevented me from being loved and connected to girls I wanted to have relationship with. You can do the same.
The other way to do this is to collapse the anchor of the emotions attached to that unresourceful meaning. This is a bit more advanced.
My Outcome
When I was able to break through the anchors and create a whole new meaning for myself, I no longer have fear to approach anybody, especially women whom I find desirable. As a result, I had many fruitful, intimate and rewarding relationships with women. Life is good.
You can have rewarding and very pleasant relationships too.
If you like to know how to change unresourceful meanings in your life then you can get FREE coaching and tips from relationship experts and other mindset experts by being part of the Geeks Want Love community.
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So… why did she say no to you? Learn more in the Geek’s Forum. What does it mean when she said no? It doesn’t matter does it? Her words are only meaningful to her. You, on the other hand, can change the meaning for yourself.
In the community, you will get to explore the reasons why women would say no to you. If you took a “no” as a harsh rejection and you created an unresourceful meaning around that then you will discover what NO really means when you subscribe to member’s content and info-mails. This will surprise you. Make you a better person who can attract love and happiness into your life.
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We also look forward to hearing from you. If you have any questions please contact me. Enjoy the Privilege Members’ content and may you have success and joy in life, and an abundance of love and intimacy in your relationships.